Sunday, September 11, 2005

More Jeff Tyberg

It's time for more Jeff Tyberg. As you know (if you don't, it won't hurt you) Mr. Jeff Tyberg is running for Congress in Wisconsin's 7th District. Here is his position paper on pro-life: I'm in the bold, black type, Jeff is the other guy:

Jeff Tyberg’s position on “Pro Life”

Our Founding Fathers made it very clear where they believed life came from and what it's worth when they wrote, "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness."
(So Jeff, I hate to say it, but the passage you quote doesn’t give a street address or price tag. Just where did life come from & how much did it cost?

Abortion is morally wrong at any stage, it is also a breach of the baby's God-given right-to-life.
(I agree abortion would be morally wrong on the stage at the Guthrie Theater. Their coat hangers probably aren't sterile.I do wonder, however, about the value of using the words “breach” & “baby” in the same sentence. Some of your supporters might confuse you with an OB-GYN. I also wonder whether God is liable when a baby is stillborn? The lawsuits, the lawsuits....[I don’t mean to be insensitive to people who have had stillborn fetuses, it’s just that Jeff Tyberg is just so full of it, that I can’t think of anything else to say - except that maybe his ideas are stillborn.])

Abortion is also a major contributing factor in the shaky future of Social Security as there are some 43 million fewer people in the workforce than otherwise would have been.
(Of course, it has nothing to do with St. Reagan’s incredibly high budget deficits or Bu$hCo’s incredibly high deficits. Well, to solve this problem, I make a modest proposal - privatize all baby making, oh wait, we already do that - socialize all baby making, thus forcing adults to have many children, even if they don’t want them. Make them suck it up to help provide Social Security benefits.)

This is also a factor in the apparent need for illegal immigrants to fill so many jobs.
(Factor this, Mr. Jeff Tyberg, if you know what I mean.)

Morally, Constitutionally, economically, abortion is bad for America and needs to be stopped!
(I didn’t know “constitutionally” was a proper noun. What needs to be stopped is Mr. Jeff Tyberg before he capitalizes again.)

It's time for a change! It's time for Tyberg!
(Oh, I don’t think so.)

No comments: